J is for Jango Fett
When Lucas made the Star Wars prequel Episode II – Attack of the Clones, he introduced us to a new character in the form of bounty hunter Boba Fett’s father. It turns out the apple fell far from the tree as he was the most worthless bounty hunter ever. If you disagree, read on to find out why.
Jango Was a Moron
Jango is hired to kill Senator Amidala. Instead of shooting her in the head, he hires an assassin to do the job in the most moronic way possible; by dropping poisonous worms into her room.
Instead of hiring a good assassin, he hires an idiot who gets herself chased and caught by the Jedi after Boba’s plan backfires. The worthless assassin is ready to give up the whole plan. Then, in an undoubtedly unethical move, Jango shoots and kills his partner to keep her from talking.
If he was following them the whole time, wouldn’t it have been better to kill the Jedi instead of his partner? He could have killed them with the darts, gone back and finished the job. Instead, he leaves the Jedi with a traceable dart that leads them right to the hidden clone planet of his employers.
Jango Couldn’t Hit the Broad Side of a Barn
Bounty hunters should be a good shot, but he couldn’t shoot anything. He shots hundreds of times in the film and never hit anyone but his partner.
Jango’s Armor Was Worthless
A good bounty hunter knows the value of protection. The purpose of body armor is to protect yourself from attack. Both Boba and his father wore special armor that covered their entire bodies. This allowed them to resist most attacks. That is until a Jedi Knight clumsily swung a light saber and cut his head off.
Not only did a Jedi run straight at him and take off his noggin, it was the most awkward of all the Jedi: Mace Windu. Mace had all the style and grace of a water buffalo and he still managed to cut off the head of a seasoned bounty hunter.
Isn’t the point of a helmet to protect your head? Shouldn’t it have provided some resistance? He knew he was jumping into an arena with dozens of light sabers, shouldn’t he have at least anticipated one might take a swing at him?
Nope, he unceremoniously falls to the ground dead. Boba took his helmet and, no doubt, installed a couple of neck shields.
Jango Had All the Stealth of a Water Buffalo
Good bounty hunters know how to be discreet and stealthy. Not Jango.
When the Jedi show up at his house, the evidence that he tried to kill the senator is sitting in plain sight. What does he do? He asks his son to close the closet door. The dumbest move ever.
Sure, he used some secret language, but it was easy to figure out he was asking Boba to hide something. The military have a set of coded hand signals for silent communication. Couldn’t he have taught something to like that to his son?
So, Jango Fett was a terrible shot, unethical, disloyal, careless and stupid. The worst bounty hunter ever.
What do you think? Was Jango Fett the worst bounty hunter ever?
[Image Source: Papercraft by Shunichi Makino]
This post is “J is for Jango Fett, part of the “A-Z Blogging Challenge.” We’ll be posting something on our blog every day in April except for Sundays. The challenge is hosted by Arlee Bird , Jeffrey Beesler, Alex J. Cavanaugh, Jen Daiker, Candace Ganger, Karen J Gowen, Talli Roland and Stephen Tremp. Visit them today and every day for the next month!
<span class="dsq-postid" data-dsqidentifier="42144 ">9 Comments
That's a great question Naomi. The link is at the bottom of the post, but I'll probably do a whole post because they're great.
—–Original message—–
I did Jedi as my J. My husband is doing a Star Wars club with his middle school students……is there a link to the Fett papercraft directions?
http://standardspicywhatnot.blogspot.com/
Thanks April. I thought it was just me. LOL
—–Original message—–
Overt rhyme? Am i the only one that didn't get it?
—–Original message—–
Wow! Other than the corny name recognition (with the overt rhyme), this guy really sucks. The picture doesn't help his cause either. Your post was a delightful read.
He is totally the most useless bounty hunter ever! Your post was spot on. (And super funny) m/
hey there wonder twins!
first of all , great meeting you through this a-z. Your points are all funny–and yet so true. 😛 thanks for sharing!
nutschell
http://www.thewritingnut.com
Have you even serched what kind of armor he has, played Bounty Hunter, or have done any kind of reserch on him? If not, you do not know what jango has done WAY before Star Wars Attack of The Clones!!!!!!!! You just got shown up by an 11 year old.
Have you even serched what kind of armor he has, played Bounty Hunter, or have done any kind of reserch on him? If not, you do not know what jango has done WAY before Star Wars Attack of The Clones!!!!!!!! You just got shown up by an 11 year old. Oh wait, bounty hunters WORK SOLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!